Friday 26 October 2012

You are cordially invited

to the State visit of the President of Indonesia comprising of the firing of a 61 gun salute at the Tower of London.

Please aim to arrive around 11.30 at Finsbury Barracks on City Road from where you will be transporting in the Regimental Mini Bus with a police escort to the tower. The guns will be setup and fired at 13.00hrs and we will then proceed to dine in 'Armoury House'.

Ladies are expected to be attired in smart dress and a warm coat and scarf is recommended. You will be issued with ear defenders to reduce the noise.

Friday 19 October 2012

Good News


The Strident Student finally got her wish and has managed to secure a placement with the Department For International Development doing Aid/Charity work next summer in either Kenya, Sierra Leone or Somalia. It might not be most people's cup of tea but she's dead chuffed as it's part of her master plan. Until then she's slogging away at the Law conversion course and still hoping one day to make it to the realms of Advocacy.

Ms. Sensible completed and submitted her UCAS application and was rewarded with a conditional offer from Bath to study Natural Sciences so can now study in the knowledge that if she can get the grades she has a place at one of her chosen academic institutions :o)

Thursday 13 September 2012

Could this be a chink of light

Following the submission of a paper to the Board about the shopping list of issues which need to be tackled in order to make the function more effective it would seem I may have gained some recognition that someone needs to get a grip and address the situation. In the normal way of working, I have heard this anecdotally from a Board member but now need to be officially informed of approval to progress in the form of a 'Decision Sheet'... There was me thinking I had left the Civil Service in July 2001....

Sunday 9 September 2012

Another new stamp for the passport

Qatar! The landscape of which reminded me of the scene in 'Star Wars' when the X-wing fighters are dog-fighting.
I won't bore you with the work politics, nor whinge about the lack of progress.... suffice to say I did a whistle-stop tour of Dubai, Abu Dhabi, & Doha!!! The highlight of the trip was undoubtedly socialising with a few folk I rarely see. I managed to catch up with a few of the security crew and had an excellent but fairly messy night with the Sales team catching up on all the gossip, followed by a somewhat more civilised evening with Mr. & Mrs. Munro culminating with a bit of tourism watching the Dubai Fountain play to Lou Reed 'Walk on the wild side'.

Friday 31 August 2012

I'm finding this job a real struggle at times. The politics and lack of coherence in the business makes it feel pretty un-do-able. No one has complained about what I'm doing, and I think that they do recognise the issues to some extent...Maybe it's just me beating myself up that I am not making enough progress, but if I was paying my salary to someone I'd expect more. This is my twelfth week so just a couple of weeks til the end of my probation, but after a phone call with one of the senior bods in the Middle East the backdrop has changed as they are seriously considering an external supplier to provide recruitment services to the Region which is potentially yet another barrier to getting anything done effectively.

Wednesday 29 August 2012

Suffering from post sales marketing fatigue

due to spending a couple of hours with Linkedin and the retained advertising agency. I sooo hate sales pitches. I know what I want (don't I always ;o) and don't need all the spin or subtle pressuring. It was very interesting though... you can see the footprint of who has been looking at whom in finite detail, which really highlighted how much you can discover about someone on the net if you just put your mind to it.... Slightly scary stuff

Tuesday 28 August 2012

Ooo give me

a nice hierarchical business structure any day.... Bleeding matrices, there's no flipping clarity, and even less chance of someone saying JFDI (just f*ing do it).... My life nowadays revolves around 'influencing stakeholders' and making sure I have considered all of the 'touchpoints'... It's unbelievably time-consuming and hence progress is soooo slow. It clearly does my head in as during a meeting with the HR 'Change Manager' earlier today she said, "I sense your frustration"...you don't say...
She's lucky she didn't get a worse reaction than me rolling my eyes!!!

Sunday 26 August 2012

I am now a festival vetran

in all senses having spent a day exposed to the great unwashed and overflowing loos, and the delights of the 'mosh pit'. The girlies and I absolutely fab day yesterday despite the downpours, pottering down to Reading via a sumptuous lunch at Amanda Darling's. The festival was really well organised with a a free water taxi down the Thames to the site, and free 'she-wees' for the ladies urinals (WTH !?!?). We caught sets by 'Dog is Dead', 'the Vaccines', 'Florence & the Machine' were great, but unquestionably 'Kasabian' were outstanding!
I think I want to audition as one of Sergio's groupies even if I am a few years outside the upper age limit.

Friday 24 August 2012

Am I past my 'sell-by' date?

As an avid fan of Kasabian I have been desperate to see the in concert. Both Miss Sensible and the Strident Student are also heavily into them so when we saw they were headlining at Reading this coming weekend we bought tickets without a further thought.

Much as it's great that the girls are cool at going with mum, having seen all myriad of Reading go-ers (so to speak) on my journey home last night I feel whatever I wear I will be over-dressed having not acquired some ridiculously short shorts and skimpy tops to wear with my Hunter wellies.... Given I am suitably tanned from my hols, do my Blog readers believe I should rush out and purchase said items? ;o)

I asked the Middle Eastern Correspondent who replied, “oh dear, old people at Reading!”

To which I retorted, “I'm sure there'll be worse than me there... anyway, I've got a few years less on the clock than you and am in better condition”

That said, I am beginning to wonder if I should have paid good money to undergo the psychological damage of being the oldest swinger in town (in a manner of speaking), the trauma of festival toilets, never mind the potential mud bath as rain is forecast!!!

Thursday 23 August 2012

So about this jelly

I'm trying to nail to the tree... I am now starting to think it's not even as solid as jelly...
and the tree is protected by an invisible force-field of subtle politics...

The cancelled meeting was to plan mobilisation issues so we were ahead of the game.... but a roll of the dice (well a successful bid process actually) means we've now won another 2 programmes which need a bus-load of bods... How long before they start screaming for me to come and sort things out...the clock is ticking....

Then there's the miriad of low level practical challenges...
I asked someone to advertise two vacancies:
1 in Aberdeen (not posted for a couple of days as there are not enough HR bods to get this done even though this was a priority last week),
the 2nd a role in Qatar, which has been advertised but no one put the location so it doesn't show up in any of the job opportunity searches...not particularly helpful when you're trying to fill it...

Sunday 12 August 2012

Temporary intermission


whilst batteries were re-charged

Friday 20 July 2012

Pah!

I was supposed to be flying to the Middle East this weekend to meet the management team in Doha, Abu Dhabi and Dubai, and to start to compile resource plans and a delivery strategy etc. However the plug has just been pulled on the basis that there is concern in certain quarters that I am being parachuted in with some political agenda, as opposed to simply trying to do my job.

Instead there is now talk about having a flipping workshop to get some 'thought leadership' and position 'outcomes'.... Pah!!!!

So other than a couple of presentations and a paper, everything I've done is purely tactical, twiddly around the edges and adding diddly squat value to anyone. Trying to get things moving via spreadsheets and phone calls just does not work.....I'm starting to fret I don't justify my existence :o/

On the upside I now have a weekend I wasn't expecting I guess... Along with a wallet of Riyals and Dirhams I can't spend in John Lewis...

Tuesday 17 July 2012

The gang of four

From previous posts dear reader you will have noted that Frosty is feeling somewhat like a fish out of water in her new working environment. In order to maintain sanity (if it were ever there in the first place) one has sought out like-minded individuals and identified three other personages who have fairly recently joined the organisation and are also wondering WTH (NB how polite I am being) they have come in to. Two of said group and I were at dinner the other night recounting tales of incredulity at some of the things were were encountering when we came to the conclusion we have been selected as part of a 'social experiment'. Having formed that opinion we now are all inclined to laugh in the face of adversity albeit in a huddle in a corner somewhere....

Life is feeling slight more bearable.

Begging to be posted.....

Sunday 15 July 2012

One of the problemettes I am contending with is staffing for the key projects in Qatar. These are humongous affairs programme managing the construction of key bits of infrastructure worth £Ms so pretty key that we are able to mobilise individuals with fairly specific, specialist skills, at the right time. At the moment there's a whole heap of heroics going on to make this happen...rather than a plan! Consequently I have I am heading out there to look at that in more depth and try to 're-align' them with best practise.

Wednesday 11 July 2012

Queenie's in da house

...well she'd popped into Worcester earlier today so to protect the Royal personage one's not-so-small son and some of his Air Cadets Squadron chums provided a cordon for HRM Liz & the D of E... The prep for this was quite astonishing. Cue much un-bidden polishing of shoes and pressing of uniform.

Just look how shiny his shoes are!!! I only wish I could get him to put so much effort into his school work ;o)

Tuesday 10 July 2012

Am I now working in some sort of fictional environment..?

I reckon a goodly number of the folks I now work with could be more successfully employed a Dementors - I swear my soul is being slowly sucked away....

Do they have their senses of humour surgically removed before they enter the Head Office foyer!?!?

I need to find some 'normal' people...or at least on my wave-length (which might not be quite the same thing ;o) to ensure I keep my sanity. Who'd have though I'd miss the "JFDI" culture of one's previous employer...?

Transport chaos

in central London today....they decided to close a few Tube stations during this morning's rush hour in order to simulate possible problem scenarios during the Olympics.... Unsurprisingly Bedlam ensued!!! Kings Cross & St. Pancras were a nightmare; gridlocked traffic, people spilling onto pavements, folks crammed onto buses, puzzled tourists scrutinising maps, harassed Police Officers and tempers decidedly frayed.

I think it's fair to say that they better hope the worker bees stay at home and eat cheese when the Games visitors descend as Boris has advised!

Saturday 7 July 2012

Still getting to grips with the new job. The resourcing function's in a worse state than anywhere I have worked before, but the company on the whole seem blissfully unaware of the issues, and keep trying to put sticky plasters over the problems as a fix... It feels like one of those cartoon scenarios where the whole lot is creaking at the seams and about to go Ka-boom!

Anyway, I have now been asked to write a paper...'cos that will sort stuff ...obviously ;o)


Monday 2 July 2012

Today has been.....

like wading through treacle.....

Sunday 1 July 2012

I have purchased a new frock

which is hanging on the outside of the wardrobe...for 3 reasons:
1. it cheers me up - prettiful and the label states a size smaller than the 'real me'
2. the weather is crapola
3. I don't think the workforce are ready for me/it yet!
(dress code is conservative/austere to say the least)

Saturday 30 June 2012

The return of the Strident Student

Herself has decided that a career in retail management is insufficiently fulfilling, and will not save the world in any way, shape or form, so she has opted to return to education in order to commence the path to becoming an advocate. She's been accepted onto a Law conversion course and will plough her hard-earned dosh into paying the fees whilst board and lodgings are provided Chez Frosty.

Waitrose have been a most excellent employer (as ever) and kindly sorted her out with some part-time work at our local branch so she has an income stream to pay travel to Uni.

With the momentous decisions made, and plans in place, all that was left was to transport her worldly goods back to the 'vern and try to work out where the heck all the gubbins is going to go!
Hence today it was 'goodbye' to the Steel City her home of the last four years.....

Friday 29 June 2012

Here endeth week 3

with me trying to work out whether I have made a huuuuuge mistake - I've come to the conclusion:
  1. I don't think the company recognise what they need to make the function
  2. Sure as hell they don't want a gobby un-polished northerner to tell them! Question is; will I get to the end of my probation or not....?

Monday 25 June 2012

Week 3, day 1

Now spent two weeks meeting people and lifting up the edge of the carpet only to find heaps of problems as well as stumbling into a stack of politics. Flipping complicated business with the most matrix structure imaginable, and now in the midst of a huge change programme as a result of a merger....confused dot com.... I don't have a clear way forward as yet, but am going to try to crystalise the 'as is' situation and tasks to get to the 'to be'... I feel a mindmap coming on! Oh heck, could I be morphing into a Consultant! ;o)

Wednesday 13 June 2012

Week 1, day three

Trying not to think it's an 'un-do-able' can of worms...regularly reminding myself:

I've never worked in a Partnership;

Consultants haven't featured that much in my career to date (so I don't yet get the MBA text book vocaulary);

it's a totally new Sector (but that I'd never recruited in the Middle East 2yrs ago!);

In the next week I'm attending meetings re. specific projects in the Nuclear industry, as well as another on infrastructure in Qatar which will undoubtedly be yet more brain frying, but might get me into the nuts & bolts which is more my thing than theory and politics....

Friday 1 June 2012

A reality check

from a friend...

Spot on, on all counts!

Thursday 24 May 2012

Count down to exit

entailed more leaving 'dos' than you could shake a stick at - 2 of which ended up the following morning!! As well as a whole heap of work.

Instead of it being a gradual slow-down to the last day things really ramped-up as people realised I wasn't going to be there any more, so there were a stack of last minute.com tasks. In addition a number of bids with ridiculously short deadlines and quirky requirements materialised, plus the contract in Libya started to go decidedly pear-shaped so there was a "do we pull out or give it one final go?" which involved numerous tlong-distance telephone conferences. In the end the level of manic-ness was enough to convince me I've done the right thing getting out.

Wednesday 23 May 2012

Frosty

has left the building!!! The surgical attachment known as 'BlackBerry' has been successfully removed and she is no longer married to the job! :o)

Sunday 20 May 2012

Keeping up with the Craic Dealer

is no mean feat. Dara O'Briain delivered a frenetic and hilariously funny set that was, almost entirely for the first half, made up from the occupations of the Wolverhampton Civic Hall front row. He was an absolute master at audience banter who seriously impressed me with his ability to turn a brief interaction with Joe Public into a snippet of hilarious observation - surely the mark of someone unbelievably quick witted. I was further amazed that he was able to recall this in the second half, not just repetitiously; sneaking in references in when you believe his tale is going in a totally different direction.
Dara is sharp enough to be able to make up on-the-spot one liners and intricately woven yarns, then bring them like a true raconteur covering everything from fireworks, to nativity plays, to burglary and astrology – all delivered at break-neck pace.

Thursday 10 May 2012

I'll miss stuff like this...

that makes life less hum-drum.

Scenario... preparing for an interview with one of the senior managers who says....

"Give me a clue on questions. I’ll start with the usual...which Regiment were you in, which London Clubs are you a member of, which Lodge are you a member of, where do your children go to school, that sort of thing....
Maybe I could pose a few contemporary teasers as well:
‘You are in the Khyber pass, 2 days ride from Jalalabad, and short of fodder for the horses. Suddenly, 3,000 Pashtun Tribesmen descend from the heights and make towards your caravan. Armed only with a sharpened mango, what are your immediate actions on?
Seriously, give me a clue......."

Wednesday 9 May 2012

Learning the lingo & TLAs

(or 'Three Letter Acronyms' for the uninitiated)
Each time I've moved organisation I've had to learn a whole glossary of new abbreviations and try to dismiss any previous associations. Despite being given the thickest induction file I've seen in my life I've not yet started to indoctrinate myself into the new company's lingo.

I had enough issues with my current employer where the amount of militarism's was staggering. I did my best to adopt them and received responses like this:

"Point of form Ma’am. 'Ack' is the single most abused military abbreviation to pass from correct military usage into mangled civilian form. ACK is an instruction found at the bottom of a signal demanding the recipient acknowledge receipt of the same. This is not to be confused with ack-ack, an abbreviation for Anti-Aircraft fire which in turn is artillery designed to shoot upwards at aircraft. ACK is also contextual. When used by DoS it means Assistant cook.

I understand that Ack can be used as slang for acknowledgement of receipt but this is the thin end of the wedge. If we allow this sort of behaviour to pass unchecked the next thing you know we will be constructing Sangers with sandbags with the seams facing outwards. Seen it done. Completely unacceptable. Whole unit went to pot. "

Equally, when I tried to instruct them in the common vernacular/parlance....
"CBA? I can't work out what Combat Body Armour (CBA) has to do with anything."


That's 'cos it's 'Can't be arsed' (for those without teenagers)...

Tuesday 8 May 2012

'D' day

In the end I could procrastinate no more and have finally accepted the Head of Resourcing role with the company who approached me all those months ago. I will depart my current employer later this month. The irony is I am absolutely loving the job at the moment as there's so much interesting stuff to do. We're moving into a whole heap of new territories which brings with it all kinds of practical, cultural and commercial issues....precisely the sort of stuff I thrive on. That said, I have to concede that when it's bad, it's spectacularly bad, and as the saying goes, "there's no security in Security"....add to that the fact that other than the business unit in which I am based, there's nowhere I'd want to work in the wider organisation. So, it's off to Built Asset Management Consultancy I go! It was a tough decision...but almost to a man, all who've stuck their two-penneth in about the 'should I stay or should I go' saga have pointed out the new role is a huge opportunity, good for one's career and has obvious financial benefits.

Saturday 5 May 2012

Chocs away

One's not so small son who joined Air Cadets but a month or so ago, has just come back from RAF Cosford having been allowed to take the controls on his first ever flight!!! It seems as an organisation they are certainly living up to their moto...His instructor let him take control of the aircraft and he was taught how to yaw, loop and roll!!!

To quote "it was amazing"

.... all I could think was glad he's not taken after me or he'd have been chucking up!!!

Friday 27 April 2012

The horns of a dilemma

'Dilemma' coming from the Greek for 'two premises'

Interestingly in Plato's 'Phædrus' when faced with a dilemma one has not just two, but three classic refutations.... take the left horn .... or, the right horn.... ....or, go between the horns!!!

I've tried applying logic (pros & cons) and philosophising (so that's where the kids get it from)...A friend very kindly pointed me at 10 reasons why not to accept a counter-offer which has fried my head even further....as a consequence I'm still really struggling to decide between the options....but.....

If it's meant to be, it's meant to be

Que sera, sera

What's meant for you won't pass you by

Inshallah

.....and all that jazz...

Sunday 22 April 2012

'Should I stay or should I go'

Normally when something plays on my mind, it manifests itself by either a level of distraction in my day-to-day activities, or the emergence of my good friend 'Insomnia'.  The current situation has produced a new symptom of stress...jaw ache....It would appear I am clenching my teeth whilst asleep hence waking with a headache and a sore jaw... Well, it's a new one.... However, despite the situation obviously playing on my mind, I'm no nearer to a decision...
As Mr. Strummer sang:
"If I go there will be trouble,
And if I stay it will be double"

Hmm, on reflection maybe his views are slightly unhelpful

Friday 20 April 2012

Better the devil you know...???

I am still working my notice and went into the new place on Wednesday night to meet a few people and start to get up to speed. Turned out to be a bit of a shocker - I heard stuff about the lack of support to the initiative I'll be heading up, the fact there was no funding for systems to provide data, and looked at the chaotic way they were doing things - I was totally over-faced and if I'm honest a bit scared. Really made me question things...

The three hour journey back to base gave me time to reflect. I realised accepted the new role because the offer made me feel that another company recognised my ability (sorry yep that's ego!), and the position gave me chance to move on with my life, leave the cr*p behind, and be more financially independent. Seemed sound reasons at the time....After all, I'd had six months of a pretty hellish time....Worked for a duplicitous boss who gave me no support, had 50% of the staffing I needed, and operated under a dysfunctional management team. Whereas now I have a new, supportive, reasonable boss, improved staffing levels, changes to the senior management team, plus recognition of the previous issues. My gut says stay where I am...It's been a culmination of things... the manageable work situation, the uncertainty re. the new role, the lack of stability at home. It suddenly hit me I'm not sure I can deal with more change on top of that.  It also feels as though the  management suddenly realise what I do and the hole I will leave, etc. etc.

Tuesday 17 April 2012

'Frosty' Trip Advisor

strongly recommends a couple of places she's had cause to frequent this very eve, both of which are on Caxton Street, SW1.

Myself and a couple of guys from my team had a really good meal at Tapster....Marinated rabbit stew with calasparra rice, and dark chocolate tart, washed down with a very nice Merlot followed by an excellent vintage Port.
Suitably satisfied, I ambled down the road and stayed at St. Ermin's hotel which I have to say is one of the nicest hotels I've been put up in of late. The rooms are nicely decorated, clean and more spacious than most in central London, plus all of the staff I've dealt with have been both friendly and helpful. Add to that a great concept of 'Wake & Take' breakfast - a cup of freshly brewed coffee and artisan muffin, served as a take away from the lobby for those of us who struggle to get out of bed in the morning and don't like eating alone. Not stayed there before not now definitely now top of my list for overnights when working from the London office...and just look at the fab architecture.

Thursday 5 April 2012

Minor Mayhem is no more

he's been replaced by a strapping young man. Having only had girls before, the evolution of my not-so-small son has been a bit of a shock. It started with phoning the house to say I was homeward bound only to have the phone answered by someone with a deep booming voice, the the delayed realisation the person on the other end of the line was what had previously been my little boy. In reality 'little' is no longer an appropriate adjective to use where he is concerned as at 14 he is already beginning to tower over his mother. Unfortunately it's not just me who's noticed these changes it would seem; his eldest sibling has commented that on reading his Facebook page "it scares me that girls think he is 'cute'". On the basis of these points I think that a rename is required....so 'Major Mayhem' it is henceforth.

Monday 2 April 2012

The office move

has been what can only be described as a bit of a cluster f*ck... predictably given the track record of things with this particular organisation.

We arrived in our brand new shiny office first thing to discover 2 crates of files were missing and we'd got a load of guys deploying to Afghanistan the next day. No prizes for guess which info we needed? Yep...those that were disparu... The ladies toilets didn't work effectively (I'll spare you the details!), there was no loo roll in any convenience, the specially company branded cups & mugs they purchased were all chucked out as they weren't heat proof so a number of people burnt their hands (serious HSE incident methinks), there was no milk to be had 'til mid afternoon (not that it mattered as there was nothing to make a cup of tea in anyway), and to cap it all, the chilled water dispensers remained empty for the entire day...

After a thorough search of the building I managed to located the 2 crates secreted in the Board room (why I have no idea...) and got 2 burly removal men to deposit them next to my desk to unpack bright and early tomorrow.

Friday 30 March 2012

Word's starting to leak

that I'm on my way... over the last few days I've had a series of emails from various geographical locations but also a number of photographs which people have taken along the way - mostly me in body armour looking dishevelled but a couple of more civilised looking snaps like this of dinner in Al Qadisiyah, Baghdad last November. We had a lovely night sampling local dishes, followed by a cinema night watching a bootleg copy of 'London Boulevard'.

I guess most people who read these posts probably think I'm barking mad or have masochistic tendencies, but I have truly enjoyed (almost) everything I've done; had some superb experiences and met some absolutely fabulous people along the way. I'm pretty sure that it's influenced my perspective on life for the better.

Friday 16 March 2012

'Integrity'

seems to be one of the more favoured 'values' that major organisations like to bandy about. There's been a lot in the press recently due to the resignation of Greg Smith from Goldman Sachs. The press relating to his open letter to the New York Times has been mixed. Whilst many have applauded his stance, morals, and courage of his convictions; many others have said he was idealistic and naïve. Having worked in business which are predominantly about the delivery of skills/expertise through manpower for some 12+ years now, and my personal view is that staff are frequently no longer seen as an asset but simply a means to an end.

On a personal note, I'm currently viewing first hand how someone who has served a business for many years, with an exemplary record of performance, no absence, and obvious measurable results; recently praised by the CEO in front of their peers, their success cited on internal posters; has been turfed out on the quiet without any due consideration. A pretty damning indictment of one of that business' alleged core values. Shocking stuff!

PS. The 'values' pic is from Enron....tiny bit of irony....

Monday 12 March 2012

It's like living in a revolving door!

so much change and stuff to get my head around at the moment.....

Some positive - Young Blood has been accepted on both a Masters course in Human Rights & Genocide Studies and a Law conversion course and is now trying to decide which to opt for from a future career perspective as well as work out the practicalities of funding, and moving from the Steel City etc.

Some not so positive - an issue which I am not permitted to blog about but will basically make me the sole provider for the Frosties in the very near future. Talk about shock to the system!

Just when you think things are stable...All change....

Sunday 11 March 2012

Being asked the impossible

is a pretty common occurrence in my current job. Today we heard we are the preferred bidders for a project in Libya. The bid was submitted quite some time ago and at that point I raised concerns about the feasibility of manning it should we be successful. As usual I was patted on the head and ignored....So here we are with contract mobilisation 2 weeks away and no real plan. I love our Business Development guys (not) :o/ Needless to say I envisage having to go out there to sort out the mess. Even if we are able to sort out a transfer from the existing incumbent we’ll have to screen and vet etc. To say it'll be a challenge is a bit of an understatement...the current provider is a Franco/Hungarian outfit which will make it a challenge in itself...never mind the backdrop of Libya itself.

Somehow people seem to reckon I'm capable of sorting this stuff out....Me with my grade B at 'O' level in French donkeys years ago, and my one word of Hungarian - 'Goulash'!

Anyone got a Babel Fish I can borrow?

Friday 9 March 2012

The deed is done

I've handed in my notice!!

Much as am relieved to be able to have done so, I can't help feeling slightly bad as my leaving causes my boss a bit of a headache. He's a thoroughly decent chap and the working environment has been so much better since he came; but this is a good opportunity in so many ways; I feel I need to grab it, scared though I am of the step up, not to mention the possibility of failing.
My head's in a much better state than it's been for a while. It's been a horrible period of uncertainty/ambiguity for the last seven months...the work situation and my previous boss's behaviour meant I felt constantly culpable, vulnerable or both!!...it fried my brain, but now I can move on and draw a line under the whole thing.